It’s Global Parents Day, guys!
Yes, believe it or not, there is actually a celebration called Global Parents Day. Kind of a western thing lol.
It’s the one day in the year where both mums and dads are praised for their unconditional love and support amongst other things. Putting up with crazy kids with little to no renumeration deserves some kind of acknowledgement, you’ll have to admit.
Now when it comes to parents, our Naija parents are as unique as they come. Their sense of humour, discipline “styles” and perspective on life are in a league of their own and that’s what makes us love them even more. We thought today would be a better time than ever to shine the spotlight on those one-of-a-kind one liners that almost every Nigerian kid should be familiar with.
1. “Put it on my head”: The classic response to an innocent request. “Where do I put this tray/plate/book/item that I am kindly trying to give you in the first place”. Put it in my mouth is a slightly different variation that “enters” more, if you get our drift.
2. “Before I sound your face”: That moment when your parents forget they gave birth to an actual human being and not a percussion instrument. LOL! The beats some make on their kids’ faces are Grammy-worthy though, undoubtedly.
3. “Am I your mate?“: How can we almost forget this one? The classic line used to put you in your rightful place, the one that’s no fault of yours, remember.
Read also: 9 Reasons Why We Love Our Naija Mums
4. “Does your friend have two heads?” What parents say when that “friend”, that I-Too-Know you can’t stand, comes first thanks to a few meagre GPA points. And who can forget the continuation…? “After all, I used to come first all the time”. To which we respond, if everybody in their time came first, then who was second? Surely, someone had to be second.
5. “You want to kill me abi? You cannot kill me!” From skimpy clothes (that really aren’t that skimpy) to “embarrassing” them in public, it’s hilarious how our small acts of innocence are sometimes seen as murder attempts. Like we’d really want to do that anyways *side-eye*
6. “Money doesn’t grow on trees”: When parents give us “facts”. #ClassicParentBehaviour LOL.
7. “Who born who?”: The facts continue, this one being a bit more obvious than the last.
Read also: 15 Things You Can Only Find In Nigeria
8. “My friend, if I slap you”: In another society, a friend is usually a term of endearment. You know, what you say right before you get a warm hug. But not in Nigeria apparently…
9. “I will show you pepper”: A cue to run like your life depends on it, ’cause the pepper in question is usually a hot, burning sensation on your skin.
10. “Face your books”: … Because boys and girls can wait.
Sigh. If you had N1 for every time you heard this line, you would probably be popping champagne with Jay Z right about now.
LOL. What funny things did your parents say growing up? Let us know below.