If you don’t know what friends with benefits are then it is most likely you live in a convent, monastery or better yet, under a rock. But I will cut you some slack, because sayings are constantly changing. Friends with benefits (FWB) are friends who decide to introduce physical intimacy into their platonic relationship. It allows for each person’s physical needs to be met, until they find a person they are ready to commit to or get tired of the situation.
Based on the definition, I am sure you can already see how messy things can possibly get. Personally, I wouldn’t recommend getting involved in this kind of situation. It will end in tears. Maybe yours, maybe the other person’s…but tears are promised.
The notion of ‘friends with benefits’ only further promotes ‘hook-up culture’, which refers to casual sex encounters, including one-night stands and other related activity, without necessarily including emotional intimacy, bonding or a committed relationship.
An FWB situation is simply hooking up with someone, who is most times a friend, over a period of time. In this case, hooking up can be defined as anything ranging from kissing to actual intercourse. It depends on the couple.
One thing that clearly emerges from this type of arrangement, is that one person subconsciously begins to place the responsibilities and expectations that they would have of a significant other on their “buddy”. This is less than ideal.
Here’s how it can all go wrong, easily.
They’re able to take care of your physical needs, but since you’re in a super casual relationship with them, they probably won’t be interested in fulfilling your emotional needs. You won’t get adequate amounts of attention and you definitely won’t be able to use them as your soundboard. Is what you’re doing wise?
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Written by Oladotun Adio