By Damilola Faustino
Envy is a feeling of discontented or resentful longing aroused by someone else’s possessions, qualities, or luck. This feeling if not controlled can make you dislike someone without a particular reason or go beyond reasonable limits to acquire what the person possesses. Either way, nothing good comes out of it. You will just be bogged down because of what other people are doing. Here are five strategies you can use when you find yourself feeling envious:
Don’t fight with your feelings
When you fight with your feelings, they fight back. Typically anything you to do try to push away intrusive, unwanted thoughts will result in experiencing a higher frequency of those thoughts. Instead, try just labeling the emotion. Identifying the emotions you’re having takes the edge of them. Just acknowledge, “I feel envious.”
Train yourself to celebrate others’ successes
Changing your behaviour is usually the best way to change your thoughts and feelings. Practice making positive comments and gestures when someone in your life experiences some kind of success. For example, send an email or a card to a friend who gets a promotion.
Avoid other envious people
When you surround yourself with positivity, you’ll have a more optimistic outlook. If you’re surrounded by pessimism, then you’ll have a more negative demeanour. Each and every day your peers impact your thoughts. If you’re surrounded by people who are petty and say negative comments due to jealousy, you’ll be more inclined to do the same. Eliminate these individuals from your life.
Give what you’d want from others
Treat others the way you want to be treated. Would you rather have someone be genuinely happy for your achievements, or would you prefer receiving a fake smile and a half-hearted congratulations? Instead of letting your resentment and jealousy take over your life, try to remind yourself how you’d want to be treated if the situation was switched around. Taking a walk in another person’s shoes can change the way you think.
Appreciate yourself more
While it’s good to appreciate other people, remember to take care of yourself. Oftentimes, you can feel depressed after comparing yourself to other people. For example, if you’re jealous that you can’t play a sport as well as a friend, remind yourself that you have skills in other areas. Perhaps you’re a strong musician or you have an excellent memory. Be proud of your strengths.
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